Keep calm and delay gratification

Keep calm and delay gratification

 

Humans are hardwired to want things NOW. The urge towards immediate satisfaction is known as instant gratification. Psychologists define instant gratification as the temptation to forego a benefit in order to obtain a less rewarding but more immediate benefit. This phenomenon is something that is particularly evident in the “microwave generation” of today. Young people have a seemingly uncontrollable urge to want good things and to want them now. We want to experience pleasure or fulfillment without delay. The pleasure principle is basically the driving force that compels humans to gratify their needs, wants and urges. These needs, wants and urges can be as basic as the need to eat, or as complex as the “need” for the latest iPhone (or whatever the trend of the day dictates).

 

Personally, I get off on instant gratification. Whether it’s working out or working on improving my life, I want to see instant results. And when I don’t, I become despondent. I have this innate desire to avoid delay because when I feel like I am denying myself something, I get a great sense of discomfort. It’s caused me to be impulsive and it’s probably the reason why I got my nipples pierced post breakup. I have, however, realized that instant gratification has been the real source of my discontentment, and I am now embracing the idea of delayed gratification.

 

Before we move on, allow me to say that I do not believe that all instant gratification is bad. There’s nothing wrong with wanting or needing things or experiences in a timely manner. Some people get off on seeing results because they’re motivated by seeing rewards. However, I do believe that it is important for people to balance their desires with a realistic sense of timing and patience. Instant gratification by itself isn’t a bad thing. Perhaps it’s our unrealistic expectations and outside pressures which we take upon ourselves that add up to the negative discourse surrounding instant gratification.

 

To be fair, media portrayals and the self-love era we’re in does not make things any easier. Very often I see the glamorous lifestyles and possessions of others on social media, and I am overcome by a wave of anxiety and the fear of missing out (FOMO). As a result, I, and many others out there, have become accustomed to thinking I have to achieve everything in a short span of time, and that I have to be happy all the time. Life is not a constant high, so we need to be okay with not being okay and waiting (while working) for the things we really want.

 

For those of you who get off on instant gratification (like me), I want to offer a different perspective.

 

A friend of mine is in the process of a bedroom make-over, and unsurprisingly her initial desire was to get everything done in one go. That’s how the media portrays it, right? You’re supposed to spend a considerable sum of money on renovations, furniture, décor, etc. all at once, right? For some, yes. For her, no. As a first-time entrant in the labour force, this kind of approach is impractical for her. It took a conscious decision on her part to do things one step at a time. The way you go about getting what you want may not produce instant results, and the path you take may be very different from what is “trendy”, but the reward will be far greater and last far longer. My friend is now creating her desired bedroom in a way that is practical and beneficial for her (save this story and learn from her experience).

 

I think many of us could do with being more present and consciously analyzing a situation before diving head-first into an impulsive decision. Whether it be renovating your bedroom, or getting a post break up nipple-piercing (even though this was a liberating experience for me), I think escaping the trap of instant gratification will require you to ask yourself: Do I need this now?

 

NEWSFLASH: Good things comes to those who wait (and work).